A value "is a characteristic of merit to which we can live by”, Dr J Richard Cookerly, a relational Psychotherapist explains. It seems that though people say, “I love you” with relative ease, not many live a life of love. Actually, it doesn’t seem like many people define the values they live their life by.
We say we value honesty, but lie when needed: “I’m sick” to get a day off work, or “I returned the film by 7pm” to avoid the late return fee. We don’t mean what we say, or say what we mean, when a lie can smooth over the unpleasant truth.
Others say they value respect, but will laugh at a racist joke or gossip behind someone’s back. Or in a fight forget that they love and respect that person and deliberately say hurtful things just to win the argument.
If we value love, and chose to live a life of love, then all our actions, thoughts and words needs to be loving. We need to be kind even to the people who are mean or rude and don’t deserve it. We need to hold our temper in heated moments.
But imagine the world if everyone truly valued love. Doesn’t that thought take your breath away? Poverty, disease, illiteracy, arms
race, global warming-wouldn’t that all be solved by humanity together.
Dr. Adam Bartlett once said to me that ‘As everyone is cynical these days, the only radical position to be in life, is to be an
optimist.’ So even when it feels like a Pollyanna attitude to have, it’s time to choose to value love.
Penelope Jane Jones.